When comparing my first initial draft of project 3 to the final draft that I walked into submission day with, there was significant improvement that was made throughout the revision process. Early on when I was constructing my first draft or two, I was more focused on getting information out onto my document rather than actually working with the material in a way that made sense. It is noticeable that in beginning stages of my drafting I was presenting ideas but not necessarily providing more context to elaborate on it. My classmates also recognized this as when we had done peer review, as the most frequent feedback I got was to elaborate more. Therefore, when it came to building my final paper, I really went below surface level to deeply expand and analyze the ideas that I presented. Part of this included bringing in more of my personal experiences to help strengthen my essay and I demonstrated the “so what” factor and how technology can be of a bigger concern. More specifically I highlighted, “However, this is lost as we’ve shifted our attention to technology, which will have lasting effects in terms of the future and shaping our career as we can’t perform in the workplace successfully.” This shows that I was able to revise my work at more of a global concern by demonstrating technologies impacts in life on a new scale. With this being said, my development especially when it comes to revision has changed as I’ve shifted to spending more quality time revising based on further developing ideas, rather than making simple adjustments like fixing grammar errors or other things of that nature.
